I don't know what to do.
We've been renting the same place for five years. Our landlord has decided to renovate and she's not renewing our lease. So now we have four weeks to work out what the heck we are going to do.
I hate change.
My Dad is trying to sell the house I grew up in. I want to buy it. But it's five hours drive from here. Would Mr B & I survive in the country? Is it really about the house? Or am I just trying to hold onto things that are already gone?
If we're going to have babies in the next few years (which is the general plan right now) then I really want to be near my Mum - who lives five hours away. So maybe we should buy the house.
But Mr B is a city boy. What if he hates the country?
We could always move back.
I hate not knowing what's going on. At the moment we have four weeks left in our place and no concrete plan about what the heck we are going to do then. I feel so stressed.
I just want someone to tell me what to do.
We've been renting the same place for five years. Our landlord has decided to renovate and she's not renewing our lease. So now we have four weeks to work out what the heck we are going to do.
I hate change.
My Dad is trying to sell the house I grew up in. I want to buy it. But it's five hours drive from here. Would Mr B & I survive in the country? Is it really about the house? Or am I just trying to hold onto things that are already gone?
If we're going to have babies in the next few years (which is the general plan right now) then I really want to be near my Mum - who lives five hours away. So maybe we should buy the house.
But Mr B is a city boy. What if he hates the country?
We could always move back.
I hate not knowing what's going on. At the moment we have four weeks left in our place and no concrete plan about what the heck we are going to do then. I feel so stressed.
I just want someone to tell me what to do.
24 Ideas shared:
Awww, Mrs. T, this is really hard! 4 weeks seems like not much time, but at least it's not 4 days! You and Mr. B have some time to work through this and make a decision that's right for both of you. My fiance is also a city boy (I am a suburbs girl). Right now I am compromising for him, later he will compromise for me. Hang in there :)
Oh I hate the lead-up to making big decisions, but it is a greay feeling after they are made.
Just talk about what you both want, what is best for your future, and decide basd on that. Deciding where to live now isn't irreversible. You can change your mind later :)
It is a hard one, have you thought about the practical things like finding jobs so that you can pay the mortgage. Is there much in the way of work where the house is? Would you both be fulfilled?
Most importantly talk to Mr B I'm sure he'll be there with the answers you need.
ryan and i live in his grandma's house. there is something awesome about keeping it in the family. also, outside of the city, I have a nice little plot for a garden, live across from a gorgeous marsh, live not too far from parents, etc. Like you said, you could always move if it didn't work out. I say, take the chance!
good luck with everything, wishing you the best of the situation!
Awe, in this case change does suck! But I'm sure once you've both turned it over (and over) in your heads you'll come to a great solution.
Good luck with everything :)
oh my.... i want to tell you to buy the house. i feel connected to my grandma's house the same way. we love living in the city, too. i can see how you'd feel so conflicted. i'm sorry, mrs t. the answer will come soon.... keep us posted, please.
My husband is a country boy, moved-suburban for me. I'm a city girl who grew up in the country. I think if you and Mr. B discuss it, you will see that you can manage most anything! I'm so sorry you've had such a rough run of it since your wedding re: your parents. Its so hard to think when your foundation is shaking beneath you. :( Stay strong, and lean on Mr. B. That's what he's there for. Good luck working out your tough decisions-it's enough to make anyone crazy, but you can pull through this!
Let us know what you go with.
-Tree
Sorry to hear you're so stressed! Change and making big decisions can be pretty scary stuff - but it can also be very rewarding if/when it all works out! But if it doesn't, the good thing is that you can always change your mind. Good luck!
I totally feel your pain on this! We just got a contract on our condo so we have to be out in 2 months or less and got into a fight last night about where to move. He wants us to move in with his sister for a while to save money and I would rather rent a cheap 1 bedroom apartment for the time being. Ugh. It's hard. I'm sure you'll work it out though. At least you will be together wherever you live.
I know this is probably cheesy, but for me a comprehensive list of pros and cons for the various options usually helps me get a better handle on what I am feeling and thinking...
Hang in there. You guys will work something out.
Oh man dear, that is a really tough question. No matter what, make a decision that is best for both of you and that the other one can handle. Hmm are there options in between?
i know how you feel. andy and i are applying for jobs...we don't have any idea where in the world we are going to live. right now we're literally living in his vanagon! (but mostly staying with friends!)
Oh wow! That is quite the dilemma. Honestly, I would say the best thing to do is follow your heart! Good luck!
Aw, friend! I'm so sorry! I feel for you. It's really tough to have to make such a big decision in such a short amount of time. Such a monumental thing as where to live is not something that should be rushed. I'm really sorry you've been put in this position, but I'm confident you and Mr. B will figure out something that works for you both! Good luck, and keep us posted!
Em
Oh man, so often I just wish someone would tell me what to do too.
What has Mr. B said about moving to the country? Is he up for trying to? Like you said, you could always move back if it doesn't work for you guys. That's kind of the general attitude I have about my move.
These big moves are life changing and risky. I'm right there with you. Pro/con lists are helpful, but what feels most right? What is your gut instinct? That's what I went with. And if it doesn't work out, well, cross that bridge when you come to it.
Move to Cali! I'll help you raise your kiddos :) Mr Fix It and I are total city kids...I could never handle it in the country though I love visiting there.
You are young enough that you can test out some ideas and if you have to move a few times, then so be it. I had some friends who went through several house moves and job changes within the first couple years of their marriage. They finally settled down in Idaho for a the past few years and then just moved back here to the same house they had years ago for a one year stay. They have 3 kids. You can do it...just hang on for the ride and the unknown.
Oh hugs, I'm sorry to hear that you need to move.
You need to decide what is write for you and Mr B. Talk it through, over and over.
Yikes - having a deadline for big decisions like that is no fun!
Things to think about - can you both get work in the country town easily (or do your current jobs remotely)? Would your dad consider having you rent the place so you can try 'the country' out for a little while?
As others have said, do what feels right for both of you. And you can always move if it doesn't work out as you'd hoped. Good luck!
buy the house!
haha - there. i told you what to do. ;) if only it were that easy right? and, in case that wasn't what you wanted someone to tell you to do:
don't buy the house!
xoxo
I say don't buy the house... unless you really really love the house (and not just for the memories). I've bought a family place (to help another family member out) before and the worst bit of it when it was all done was that the place never truly felt like 'mine'. Even though it was signed, sealed and paid for, it was still theirs...
If I were you guys, I would rent another city place for the moment and have a look at country places nearer your mum that you guys could see yourselves living in...
Just my advice – feel free to ignore it completely!
Good luck and try not to stress too much xx
ohh tricky one.
Can you move into the country house for a few months to see how you go in the sticks?
Let us know how you go!!
Hmm. I remember when I had consider moving to Sydney from Melb. Big changes are hard.
I'm like you. I HATE CHANGE...
Go and spend some time down there, and when your there think about what it would be like to be there on a permanent basis.
Thats what I did and 7 years later I'm still in Sydney.
And remember, you will be together so thats the most important thing!
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